Still waiting...

So, as told by the title, we are still waiting on immigration. This is getting quite frustrating as we need to be out of this apartment in one month and should be, in the meantime, packing and making plans but we can't. Our interview for immigration will be in Montreal, and as we are in Alberta, this means it would be nice to have sufficient heads up as to when we need to be in Montreal so we can plan things like flights, where to store our stuff while we are gone, or moving somewhere else temporarily. Yet because we know nothing, we are left feeling the weight of the days ticking past us and our eviction date fast approaching. We cannot book flights, we cannot pack anything more, we cannot stay much longer yet we cannot leave. We have tossed many ideas around, such as moving early to Quebec and staying with my family while we wait for the interview, but this only works if the interview isn't too far out, and preferably if Nathan can get a  job out there. Which, it looks like, is a possibility. Second, we've thought about moving temporally to Washington with Nathan's family and waiting until it's time to go to Montreal. Again, preferably if Nathan can get a job. I would be legally allowed to reside in the states for 6 months as a visitor. However this idea only works if the interview is a long ways out. So, as you can see, we are at a standstill, waiting, frustrated and unable to plan or make any moves or changes. We are simply stuck. And I hate feeling stuck. It's kinda like emotional claustrophobia. I feel my insides screaming for change, for the ability to run, to move, to do something, anything, yet I am caged and cannot be free... we are a slave to the immigration system which has us in the very place I would do anything to be free form: the unknown. I know this is an opportunity to trust God with His timing and His plan and His provision, and I'm trying, but it is so hard to do so when Nathan and I are both so tired and so done with being here. We so badly want to move on and feel like caged birds, unable to do as we please. It is frustrating as an adult to have to wait until you are told what to do or have permission to proceed. It grates on us daily like the the chains around our ankles. Everything in me is under so much pressure, like a pressure cooker, ready to burst, to let out steam. I can't explain it much beyond that, but it builds each day and emotionally I am a wreck. I have fits of anger and crying and sheer frustration almost daily. Every day I walk with Eva to the post office, praying fervently that God would deliver us from this stagnant state by means of that letter being in my mailbox. And everyday I turn the key with eyes half shut, afraid to look, both optimism and pessimism strung up in the air, and I open it... nothing. My shoulders fall, a sigh escapes and I feel that much more broken and defeated. Lord where are you in all this? You say you will never leave me nor forsake me, do I really believe it? I think I do. I've seen it true in the past. And you are the same yesterday today and tomorrow, so I will try to be patient, I will try to trust fully, I will try to leave it all in your hands. "I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them." (Isaiah 42:16) Lord deliver us. Deliver me. If not from this waiting game then from my angry heart, my negative spirit, my un-trusting soul. Lord come be the breath I need so desperately right now. Come be the water I thirst for, the comfort and companion I crave. As depleted as I am I will carry on. I will walk in faith and, with your strength, in hope. I will wait on You, Lord, to deliver the news of immigration in Your time. Jehovah-Jireh.